I’ve never been one to judge someone based on their race, religion, beliefs, heritage or background – being of mixed races myself – however, when you use it as an excuse for your lack of tact, to be offensive and to give back handed compliments, I am pretty sure a slap to your face is the same in all cultures.
I received a text message from someone who I gave my number to almost a year ago. I am not sure why all of a sudden the impulse to message me, but there it was……”Hello, it’s E, would you like to meet for a glass of wine”?” At first this sounded pretty innocent and I was a little curious. However, after having to reschedule due to school, his messages got progressively offensive.
“If you are not consistent, it tells me that you are unreliable and confused.” First of all dickface, you are lucky I initially agreed to meet up with you in the first place. Second of all, school and work will always trump any boys, any day, all day long. Putting school as first priority does NOT make me unreliable or confused – it just means that you are less important.
“Oh no, I mean no offense. Please be nice, I am foreign.” Bitch, please! Who the fuck uses that as an excuse? I mean, I am sure that I could pull that same bullshit as my parents are foreign as well. Not sure why I gave in, but I did decide to meet up with him to see if the messages were just lost in translation in comparison to his real life persona.
I get to the restaurant (on time I might add) only to be sitting around for 10 minutes as he is late. I also made sure that he knew of my displeasure when he arrived. Ugh! Luckily I had a cocktail to calm my irritated nerves a bit, but it didn’t stop me trying to dig at him for his tardiness. The remainder of the night went surprisingly well as I got to learn about how he grew up in Paris and his family is from the Caribbean Islands. It was very interesting hearing about his culture, his travels and his experiences.
It was the messages that occurred days after that were douche level. E attempted to make plans with me for Thanksgiving. A bit weird as I barely knew him and I didn’t want to invite him to my upcoming shindig. I replied with my reasons as far as being with my friends and having plans for that night and Black Friday.
His message the next day was pathetic, “I was thinking about inviting you over for wine, but you’re gonna discourage the thought.” Now how do I respond to that? Well, I didn’t…..as I was hungover and passed out on my couch. An hour later, he sends me the following douche message, “Thanks for not responding. I’ve liked you since last year, but you act a bit too white. I wish you were more simple.” WTFUCK! Now he’s got my attention and how I wish he was in front of me so that I could punch him in his fucking face! I did the next best thing and took the high road.
“E. I was busy and not near my phone. After your racist comment, I do not think we’d get along, nor do I think we are on the same page. Thanks again for the drinks the other night and good luck.” Oh lord, that just unleashed epic novels messaged to me in even more offensive ways. His explanation was that he wished I was more Asian and that I made him wait over a year to meet up and maybe if he was White that I wouldn’t be treating him less important because he is Black. Let’s back it up here, all that know me know that I love the “honey dips” like none other, so for him to go off and blame this “hardship” on race is beyond me.
Also, how can you like someone for over a year that you don’t even know? That just makes you sound like a creepy stalker. I am not sure how things are done in Europe, but I can tell you one thing – if you are so worldly, why do you have to bring race into the picture? That made me the angriest. Accusing me of things that relate to culture or color as an excuse to cover up your own securities. Get over it and grow the fuck up.
Lesson learned. Douche via text = douche in real life. Asshole.