Now I am sure that I have touched on a few of my “deal breakers” in previous posts, but I recently went on a date and at the end I was shaking my head as to what the hell guys think that is appropriate attire to wear on a first date.
Now don’t get me wrong, I am not a total asshole. Sometimes certain activities/events require proper gear or clothing, but if you are on a first date at a nice restaurant, take some fucking time to pull yourself together, make the effort and dress to impress!! I mean, after all…I took an hour + to get ready to make sure my makeup was perfect, hair done up and my clothing and accessories were matching appropriately.
This brings me to the first “A” of deal breakers:
Attire – Don’ts:
- Athletic Look
- T-shirt, jeans, complete with running shoes.
- Outdoorsy Look
- Fleece jacket, thermal shirt, dad-jeans, and hiking boots.
- Rock Climbing Look
- 1990’s plaid, button-up shirt tucked into light-khaki, twill cargo pants, complete with toe shoes (look it up online). WTFuck!!!
- Beach Look
- Douchey t-shirt, cargo shorts and flip-flops.
- Camping Look
- Hoodie, jeans, and skater shoes.
Like I said, normally when the activity calls for it, I don’t mind any of the looks above, but on a first date at a restaurant/coffee shop/bar, at least put some effort into it. Don’t arrive as if you just got off your couch; or just got done hiking a mountain; or just finished climbing an indoor rock wall; or just returned from camping or the beach. Seriously. You probably didn’t. If you did, then get your shit together and change your damn clothes!
Attitude – Don’ts
A great attitude can go a really long way. We all have our bad days and I have had to double up on shots just to get through dates when the following occurs:
- Talking about yourself the entire date without equal parts of engaging conversation will have me thinking about other things and nodding ‘yes’ and commenting during appropriate times of your I will finally end up saying something like, “Are you done talking about yourself, yet?”
- Coming off as if your materials things are going to impress me first, rather than you. This tells me one thing; you must be insecure about yourself, so you must talk about your wealth, looks or accomplishments. Sure. We all need to impress, but boasting about it instead of being humble about it is a sure way for me to say something like, “Oh! That’s…nice” with the most plastic, fakest smile. I don’t have a poker face, so my unimpressed look usually kills it on the spot.
Age – Parameters
Sigh, this is a tricky one. I have been known to be slightly age-ist when agreeing to meet men for dates. I try to stick with the 5 years +/- as you never know someone’s maturity level until you get to know them.
The following ranges are just unacceptable:
- This age bracket usually contacts me and thinks they have something to offer. Seriously, what have you done with your life? Graduate college? Ok. Perhaps experience love, get your career started and when you are done with partying with your friends – call me in 8 years, better yet, have your older brother call me – today. Thanks!
- No. This end of the spectrum of men contacting me that is flat out disgusting. First of all, they look old enough to be my father or grandfather. Second of all, we are on the wrong page as far as starting a family goes. Not trying to be a grandmother before I am a mother. Are you fucking kidding me?!
Availability – Too much/too little
Ahhh…the ultimate deal breaker. You cannot get to know someone who doesn’t carve out time to get to know you. Priorities, betch!
See the bullshit below for “red flags”:
- This stage 5 clinger has too much time on their hands and needs to find a life outside of being needy. Although, at first it’s cute that they want to spend a ton of time with you, it starts to wane on your patience when they act like a total bitch when you are unable to arrange your schedule to be with them 7 out of 7 days a week. Good gawd! GMTFO! This is too much. I like my space and this – I can’t even handle.
- 7-10 days
- This fucker thinks that meeting up to spend time every 7-10 days is valid. This is a sure way to allow something to linger, but not really committing. Plus, it feels like the first date again for me every 7-10 days. Square 1 on repeat. On a never ending repeat. Leading to – wasting my time. Bitch, please!
Just a little ditty about the deal breakers in my book. If you experience any of these moments, make sure you end on a high note – flick them off and don’t look back.